In Conversation with Koru Kids

I was recently part of a brilliant conversation with @rach.of.koru.kids and @motherkind_zoe for the In Conversation with @korukidsofficial series. The topic was how to find the confidence to parent your way, and ultimately, how to get back in touch with your instincts.

For me, that’s a conversation that unfolds over many years, but it was really interesting to start with some of the questions that were being most frequently asked – how do we know what’s “right”? How do we know what our instinct is? How do we find the balance between listening to our inner voice and seeking guidance from experts? In my experience, this always comes back to the idea that we don’t live in a society that cultivates the environment we need to nurture our gut feelings, which often means we feel like we’re “failing” at it. With that in mind, I wanted to offer you three ideas to mull over, that may help on your journey home to your instinct.

  1. Start small. @motherkind_zoe always hits the nail on the head with this one. Listen to your body. Respond to its needs. Are you warm enough? Are you hungry? What food would your body benefit from right now? Do you need activity or rest? The more we practice incorporating this into the things we’re doing anyway, the easier it becomes to trickle into our parenting.

  2. Reduce noise. Do you find yourself overwhelmed by other peoples ideas and opinions? Try turning them down. Information overload can paralyse our intuition. We can’t hear ourselves when we’re working so hard to process the energy of others. Learning is no bad thing of course, but try focusing on one avenue of enquiry at a time.

  3. Notice the difference between your feelings and your reactions. For most of us, listening to hear or feel, rather than react has not been a habit of our lives, perhaps because we are institutionalised with right and wrong answers. What if someone else’s choice wasn’t a criticism of yours? What if you change your mind? Let’s normalise making mistakes and the nuanced grey areas of parenting.

If you’d like to catch up on the conversation, head on over to Koru Kids Instagram account and you’ll find it saved in their IGTV tab.

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